soap box

One thing I often hear in recovery groups is "They just don't understand. They don't get it. They don't understand addiction." The they refers to anyone who is not an addict be it a friend, wife, husband, mother, father, etc. While I believe that you cannot truly understand the utter craving and rawness of addiction without being an addict, I think that we must not sell ourselves, and those we love, short. I believe I've said it many times: No one understands me. No one understands an eating disorder without actually having one. No, it's probably difficult to understand the absolute fear and love of food without having an eating disorder. But, you will never have a clue unless I give you the chance to understand. Of course they will not understand if we do not allow those we love to come in and try to understand. It's complicated, it's scary, it's vulnerable. But, loved ones cannot understand by looking through a peep hole in a locked door. We have to unlock that door and open it just a crack and give knowledge a try.